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【TED】在工作场合融洽相处的3种方式

 

In 2013, I was an executive at an international engineering firm 2013年,我在旧金山一个国际工程公司 in San Francisco. 担任行政人员。 It was my dream job. 那是我梦想的工作。 A culmination of all the skills that I've acquired over the years: 我能发挥自己多年学习到的技能: storytelling, social impact, behavior change. 叙述能力、社会影响力和行为改变力。 I was the head of marketing and culture 我当时担任营销和文化主管, and I worked with the nation's largest health care systems, 并和全国最大的医疗系统协作, using technology and culture change 利用科技和文化的变化 to radically reduce their energy and water use 来大量减少他们对能源和水的消耗, and to improve their social impact. 从而增加他们的社会影响力。 I was creating real change in the world. 我的所作所为的确改变了世界。 And it was the worst professional experience of my life. 然而,这却是我体验过的 最糟糕的职场经历。 I hit the glass ceiling hard. 我重重地触到了玻璃天花板 (意为受到了职场歧视), It hurt like hell. 这深深地伤害了我。 While there were bigger issues, 尽管有更大的问题, most of what happened were little behaviors and patterns 但大多数都是关于行为模式的细枝末节, that slowly chipped away at my ability to do my work well. 正是这些琐碎的事情 逐渐让我丧失了工作热情。 They ate away at my confidence, my leadership, my capacity to innovate. 他们打击了我的自信心、 领导力和创新能力。 For example, my first presentation at the company. 比如我在公司的第一次演讲。 I walk up to the front of the room 我站在房间的前面, to give a presentation on the strategy that I believe is right for the company. 展示了我觉得公司应该采取的正确策略。 The one they hired me to create. 这正是我被雇佣的目的。 And I look around the room at my fellow executives. 而当我环顾房间里行政部门的同事, And I watch as they pick up their cell phones 发现他们都在摆弄手机, and look down at their laptops. 或者低头看着电脑。 They're not paying attention. 他们根本没在认真听。 As soon as I start to speak, the interruptions begin 当我开始说话时,有人开始插嘴了, and people talk over me again and again and again. 人们一次又一次地用声音盖过我。 Some of my ideas are flat out dismissed 我的一些想法被直接无视, and then brought up by somebody else and championed. 之后被其他人提出,却得到了拥护。 I was the only woman in that room. 我是那个房间唯一的女性。 And I could have used an ally. 我需要一个盟友。 Little behaviors and pattern like this, every day, again and again, 像这样的小事日复一日地发生, they wear you down. 逐渐侵蚀着我。 Pretty soon, my energy was absolutely tapped. 很快,我就感到筋疲力竭。 At a real low point, I read an article 在这段人生低谷,我恰好读到了一篇文章, about toxic workplace culture and microaggressions. 关于有害的办公室文化 和轻微的冒犯行为。 Microaggressions -- everyday slights, insults, 例如每天有意无意的怠慢、侮辱、 negative verbal and nonverbal communication, 负面的语言和行为, whether intentional or not, 不管是有意还是无意, that impede your ability to do your work well. 都让我无法高效地工作。 That sounded familiar. 这听起来很熟悉。 I started to realize that I wasn't failing. 我开始意识到,不是我的能力有问题, The culture around me was failing me. 而是我身边的文化在让我举步维艰。 And I wasn't alone. 我并不是个例。 Behaviors and patterns like this 像这样的行为, every day affect underrepresented people of all backgrounds in the workplace. 每天都在影响着办公室里不同文化背景的人。 And that has a real impact 而且这一现象也切实影响着 on our colleagues, on our companies 我们的同事、我们的公司 and our collective capacity to innovate. 和我们的合作创新能力。 So, in the tech industry, we want quick solutions. 在科技行业,我们通常都 习惯于寻找快速的解决方案。 But there is no magic wand for correcting diversity and inclusion. 但是纠正多样性和包容性的魔法并不存在。 Change happens one person at a time, 改变只能一个人一个人、 one act at a time, one word at a time. 一次一次、一字一句地发生。 We make a mistake when we see diversity and inclusion 如果我们不在意多元化和包容性, as that side project over there the diversity people are working on, 就会忽视弱势群体的重要性, rather than this work inside all of us that we need to do together. 我们要一起解决这个问题。 And that work begins 解决方案从 with unlearning what we know about success and opportunity. 摆脱我们对成功和机遇的认知开始。 We've been told our whole lives 我们从小就被教导, that if we work hard, that hard work pays off, 一分耕耘,一分收获, we'd get what we deserve, we'd live our dream. 我们会得到我们应得的,梦想成真。 But that isn't true for everyone. 但这句话并非对所有人都适用。 Some people have to work 10 times as hard 有些人需要付出10倍的努力, to get to the same place 才能获得一样的地位, due to many barriers put in front of them by society. 因为他们需要面对社会中的诸多障碍。 Your gender, your race, your ethnicity, 你的性别、你的肤色、你的种族、 your religion, your disability, your sexual orientation, 你的宗教、你的残疾、你的性取向、 your class, your geography, 你的社会阶层,和你的所在地, all of these can give you more of fewer opportunities for success. 这些都会决定你会获得多少机会。 And that's where allyship comes in. 这就是为什么我们需要盟友。 Allyship is about understanding that imbalance in opportunity 盟友可以帮助我们了解机遇上的不公, and working to correct it. 并想方设法改变它。 Allyship is really seeing the person next to us. 同盟是去了解你身边的人, And the person missing, who should be standing next to us. 和原本应该与你并肩作战的人。 And first, just knowing what they're going through. 先去了解他们的困境, And then, helping them succeed and thrive with us. 然后帮助他们成功,继而实现共赢。 When we work together to develop more diverse and inclusive teams, 当我们一起努力创造 一个更多元化和包容的集体, data shows we will be more innovative, more productive and more profitable. 数据显示,我们会更有创造力、 更有效率,并能创造更多价值。 So, who is an ally? 那么,谁是盟友? All of us. 我们所有人。 We can all be allies for each other. 我们都是彼此的盟友。 As a white, cisgendered woman in the United States, 作为一个在美国的白人女性, there are many ways I'm very privileged. 在很多方面我都是有优势的, And some ways I'm not. 而在有些方面则不然。 And I work hard every day 我每天都努力工作, to be an ally for people with less privilege than me. 成为比我出境更艰难的人的盟友。 And I still need allies, too. 但是我也需要盟友。 In the tech industry, like in many industries, 在科技行业,和其他行业一样, there are many people who are underrepresented, 有很多人受到了忽视, or face barriers and discrimination. 或者面对着障碍和歧视。 Women, people who are nonbinary -- 女性,非传统性别—— so people who don't necessarily identify as man or woman -- 就是不被男女性别所定义的人—— racial and ethnic minorities, 肤色和种族上的少数族群、 LGBTQIA, people with disabilities, veterans, LGBTQIA、残疾人、退役军人、 anybody over age 35. 所有超过35岁的人。 (Laughter) (笑声) We have a major bias toward youth in the tech industry. 在科技行业,我们对年轻有些许偏爱。 And many others. 当然还有更多其他人。 There is always someone with less privilege than you. 总有人比你的处境更差, On this stage, in this room. 就在这个讲台上、在这个房间里。 At your company, on your team, in your city or town. 你的公司、团队和你居住的城市中, 这样的人也比比皆是。 So, people are allies for different reasons. 所以,人们因为不同的原因组建同盟。 Find your reason. 找到你自己的理由。 It could be for the business case, 这个理由可以是商业管理, because data shows diverse and inclusive teams 因为数据显示,有多元化和包容性的团队 will be more productive, more profitable and more innovative. 会更有效率、更有创造力, 能产生更多价值。 It could be for fairness and social justice. 也可以是因为公平和社会公正。 Because we have a long history of oppression and inequity 因为我们有着很长的 压迫和不公平的历史, that we need to work on together. 我们需要一起协作。 Or it could be for your kids, 或者也可以是为了你的孩子, so your kids grow up with equal opportunities. 让你的孩子能够在公正公平中长大。 And they grow up creating equal opportunities for others. 长大后,他们也可以给他人创造机会。 Find your reason. 找到你的理由。 For me, it's all three. 对我而言,理由有三。 Find your reason and step up to be there for someone who needs you. 找到你的理由来帮助身边需要你的人。 So, what can you do as an ally? 那么作为盟友,你可以做什么? Start by doing no harm. 首先,不伤害他人。 It's our job as allies to know what microaggressions are and to not do them. 作为同盟,我们的工作是了解 何为轻微的冒犯,做到不伤害别人。 It's our job as allies to listen, to learn, 做为盟友,我们的工作是倾听,是学习, to unlearn and to relearn, 是放弃已知的,是重新适应, and to make mistakes and to keep learning. 是犯错,并继续学习。 Give me your full attention. 认真地对待我。 Close your laptops, 关掉你的电脑, put down your cellphones and pay attention. 放下你的手机,把注意力放在我身上。 If somebody is new or the only person in the room like them, 如果有新来的人,或者房间里 只有一个跟他一样的人, or they're just nervous, 或者他们只是紧张, this is going to make a huge difference in how they show up. 这些小的举动都会有很大的影响。 Don't interrupt. 不要打断别人说话。 Underrepresented people are more likely to be interrupted, 弱势群体说话最有可能被打断, so just take a step back and listen. 所以请别打断,并倾听。 Echo and attribute. 支持,并提供积极反馈。 If I have a great idea, 如果我有一个好点子, echo my idea and then attribute it to me, and we thrive together. 支持我的主意予以肯定, 我们就能一起进步。 Learn the language I use to describe my identity. 学会我用来描述自己的词语。 Know how to pronounce my name. 知道如何念我的名字。 Know my pronouns -- he, she, they. 知道我的称呼,他、她和他们。 Know the language I use to describe my disability, my ethnicity, my religion. 知道我用来描述我的残疾、 种族和宗教的用词。 This really matters to people, so if you don't know, just ask. 这一点对很多人真的很重要, 所以如果你不知道,请问我。 Listen and learn. 倾听并学习。 An executive told me recently that after doing allyship on his team, 一个高管最近告诉过我, 在他的团队里建立同盟之后, the whole team started to normalize calling themselves out and each other out 整个团队开始对自己打断别人的 for interrupting. 行为主动表示歉意。 "I'm so sorry I'm interrupting you right now, carry on." “我很抱歉,我打断了你。请继续。” "Hey, she's got a great idea, let's listen." “嘿,她有一个很好的主意。 我们一起来听听吧。” Number two, advocate for underrepresented people in small ways. 第二,支持弱势群体,从小事做起。 Intervene; you can change the power dynamics in the room. 简单的干预可以改变整个房间的气氛。 If you see somebody is the only person in the room like them 如果你看见房间里有一个弱势群体中的人, and they are being belittled, they are being interrupted, 她没有受到重视,说话被打断, do something, say something. 做些什么,说些什么。 Invite underrepresented people to speak. 邀请弱势群体的人加入对话。 And say no to panels without underrepresented speakers. 不要拒绝对弱势群体的邀请。 Refer someone for a job 介绍某人一份工作, and encourage them to take that job and to take new opportunities. 并鼓励他们接受 这份工作和这个新的机会。 And this one's really important -- help normalize allyship. 这真的很重要——让盟友变成常态。 If you're a person with privilege, 如果你是优势人群中的一员, it's easier for you to advocate for allies. 支持你的同盟就简单多了。 So use that privilege to create change. 所以用你的优势来改变现状。 Three, change someone's life significantly. 第三,大幅改观他人的生活。 So, be there for somebody throughout their career. 在职场中给予他人陪伴。 Mentor or sponsor them, give them opportunities as they grow. 教导或者帮助他们, 给他们成长的机会。 Volunteer -- volunteer for a STEM program, serving underserved youth. 志愿服务——参与一个STEM的项目, 服务弱势群体中的年轻人。 Transform your team to be more diverse and inclusive. 让你的团队更多元和包容, And make real commitments to creating change here. 并投身于改变现状。 Hold yourself and your team accountable for creating change. 让你和你的团队共同承担这份责任。 And lastly, 最后, help advocate for change across your company. 在全公司范围内倡导这件事。 When companies teach their people to be allies, 当公司教会他们的人成为盟友, diversity and inclusion programs are stronger. 多元化和包容性的气氛就会更重。 You and I can be allies for each other, 你我都可以成为盟友, whether we're inside or outside of work. 不管是否与工作有关。 So, I realized recently 我最近意识到, that I still have lingering shame and fear 我心中一直都怀有羞耻和恐惧, from that moment in my career when I felt utterly alone, 当在我的职业生涯中感到孤单、 shut out and unsupported. 沮丧和无助的时候。 There are millions of people out there, like me, right now, feeling that way. 世界上有数百万跟我经历相似的人。 And it doesn't take much for us to be there for each other. 互相支持很简单。 And when we're there for each other, when we support one another, 当我们在彼此身旁的时候, 当我们互相支持的时候, we thrive together. 我们就能够一起成功。 And when we thrive, we build better teams, 当我们成功时,我们就拥有了更好的团队, better products and better companies. 更好的产品和更好的公司。 Allyship is powerful. 同盟力量超乎你的想象。 Try it. 尝试一下吧。 Thank you. 谢谢。 (Applause) (鼓掌)

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